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Step 2, Part 2: “…restore us to sanity.”

Before we can take the 2nd part of Step 2, we have to understand exactly what it is saying.  And what it is saying is that we addicts are insane.  Only recently have I really accepted this to be the truth.  For years I glossed over this issue, thinking it referred to people who were “more addicted” than I was, like people who couldn’t hold down a job because of their addiction, or who had to be locked-up in a rubber room because of it.  You know…”insane!”  But this time around, when I really took this step the way I was supposed to, I found out that, if I was really honest about the way I had been living my life for the past 35 years, I had been anything but sane.

Although I could comprehend at a gut level that there was something very wrong with my relationship with food, and may have even gone so far as to say that I was “insane” regarding my need to consume huge quantities even when I was not hungry, besides that, I thought was fine.  Hadn’t I always had a decent job?  Wasn’t I a “good person” who was always at least “trying” to do the right thing?  Didn’t I have close friends and relatives in my life?  But it wasn’t until I started writing my mammoth 4th step, and pages and pages of dysfunctional thoughts and behaviors poured out onto the pages, that I could see that my behavior with food was merely the outward manifestation of my insane relationship to everything and everyone in my life.  Step 2 is the beginning of our coming-to-terms with this fact.

There is no doubt that accepting that we are insane is a bitter pill to swallow, but once we get it down, we are well on your way to finally addressing the real problem…US!

March 2, 2012 This post was written by Categories: On The 12 Steps Tagged with:
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