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Projection (or “2-Way E.S.P.”)

In my 4th Step, I had listed literally hundreds of people I was resentful at because of what they thought of me.  In Step 5, when I started “giving away” my 4th Step to my sponsor, she kept asking me how I “knew” what people were thinking about me.  Did I come out and ask them what …Continue reading →

“Do you believe in ‘magical thinking?’ “

This was a question my counselor asked me a while back.  I was saying that I didn’t want to “jinx” myself by mentioning that I had finally been abstinent for a few weeks,… and she responded with this question.  I was like, “No, I don’t believe in magical thinking.  It’s just one of those silly …Continue reading →

Lies On My Addiction To Food

Through the process of writing my 4th Step, I uncovered SO, so many lies that I have been living by  – without even knowing that I was living by them.  That’s the scary part.  It’s one thing to know you are lying to yourself, but it’s quite another to have no clue that you’re lying …Continue reading →

Step 1, Part 1: “…we were powerless…”

By virtue of the fact that you are “doing” Step 1, I think it is first important to give credit where credit is due: Congratulations!  You have obviously made three very important decisions: to be open-minded about the 12-Step process, to at least try this new approach, and to change from a mindset of perfectionism …Continue reading →

My Cure For ‘Skatter-Brain’

The best way I have found to date for quieting down my brain is not at all I expected it would be.  I was having lots of trouble “emptying” my mind, supposedly so I could meditate, but I never got that far.  To me, that task was so difficult that after several days, I was actually …Continue reading →

This Is NOT A Moral Issue!

Contained within this category of ‘things-I-wish-I-had-been-told-when-I-first-came-into-program’ are items which WERE told to me, whether directly or indirectly, but that I didn’t “hear” until years later.  Such is the case with this idea of morality. For whatever reason, my entire life was spent cowering beneath the shadow of the belief that I was a “bad” person because I could …Continue reading →

What is a “Higher Power?”

In the world of anonymous programs, “Higher Power” refers to anything that you can believe-in that is both outside of yourself and more powerful than yourself.  (Of course, it can be argued that your Higher Power dwells inside you, but that is a different topic for a different day.)  This Higher Power can be anything …Continue reading →

What are “The Promises?”

“The Promises” of all 12-Step programs come from “The Big Book” of Alcoholics Anonymous.  (You can read all of them by clicking on “The Promises” at the top of this page.)  They are the reason why we go through all the hard work of “doing” the 12 Steps.  Like myself, millions of people in recovery …Continue reading →

“Recovering,” “Recovered,” “Cured”: What’s the difference?

After you have a few meetings under your belt and you have listened to several different speakers, you will probably start to notice that some of them say they are “recovering,” others say they have “recovered,” and still others say they are completely “cured.”  Is there a difference?  To many in program, there actually is. It has been my …Continue reading →

“Hat-Blat”

One of the phrases you will hear if you go to a few AA meetings is “H.A.L.T.”  It is a mental reminder designed to help alcoholics kill the urge to drink by asking themselves if they have let themselves become too Hungry, too Angry, too Lonely, or too Tired.  I’ve added a couple of things to …Continue reading →