The Battle To Be More Disciplined

I have known for many years that lack of discipline is one of my biggest character defects.  You would think that after being abstinent for over 6 years and maintaining a 100+ pound weight loss that I would have conquered that problem by now.

Unfortunately, for me, that is not the case.  At least, not yet.

I am clearly a work in progress.

I hate to admit it, but I am only now just beginning to address this issue in relation to other areas of my life.

I recently joined a gym.  Again.  But with what I hope is a much healthier attitude this time around.  I am there to feel better about myself.  Period.  Losing more weight, if I do, will be a happy accident.

I finally devised a new and improved daily schedule.  Working from home, it is so easy to go off track with respect to my routine.  I am a morning person, so I moved my writing tasks to the first part of the day (when I am at my most creative), and I do my property management work in the afternoons.

I had my food plan reviewed by a professional.  I know that my fellow OA’s can appreciate what a touchy subject this can be, and it was difficult, but I decided it was time to cut back a little more.  I am not going to do it all at once, but I now I have a slightly cleaner, slightly smaller plan than I had before.  I have been following it for a couple weeks now, but I am not counting days.  I refuse to go back to that mind game.

Baby steps, but steps nonetheless.

The bottom line is, none of this would even be possible if I was still in the food.  I simply would have no room in my mind to even consider confronting this problem, let alone the mental and physical energy to actually DO something about it.  And the only way I know to ensure that I maintain my abstinence, one day at a time, is by going to meetings, staying in contact with my OA friends, and staying close to my HP.  If I continue to do “the next right thing,” I can’t fail.  And neither will you!

February 9, 2016 This post was written by Categories: My Battle With Character Defects 2 comments

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